Posted in Addiction, recovered, recovery, Uncategorized

Total Addiction Healing For Life

I Am the Lord who heals you.
Exodus 15:26

Addiction has a permanent end with Jesus Christ.  You only have to receive Him, live for Him, absorb His Word daily, and believe.

Yeshua Hands reaching out

Faith based compassionate and personalized recovery online and by phone ~ CLICK HERE

Posted in Accidental Overdose, Addiction, Opiates, Opioids, Prescription Drug Addiction, Recovery to being Recovered, Uncategorized

I Got Through it all because of Jesus ~ because He First Loved Me


Back in March of 2007, I had, overnight, become really really sick in withdrawal.  Despite the fact that I was a nurse and worked in a rehab, I didn’t know I was in withdrawal.  I knew I was dying, but I didn’t know why.  If you’ve experienced withdrawal, you know exactly what i mean.  As a matter of fact, it’s the reason you continue to use and afraid to get help.  As soon as you start going into it, you hurry to get out.

I had gone to the doctor who was my neurologist at the time, who told me that he thought I could be in withdrawal from my body needing more drugs.  So, what did he do?  He told me to decrease my 12 narcotics by half!!!!!!!!!!!!   Lots of exclamation points because that was what set me into the worst withdrawal anyone could ever enter into.  It was as though I was pushed off a 30,000 foot mountain.  I was falling – and falling hard and fast.  Moment by moment it kept getting worse and worse.  I knew this could only end up with my death once I reached the bottom.  How could it not?  It just goes to prove that most doctors don’t know what they’re doing with medications.  Logic says that if withdrawal is caused by my body requiring more drugs, cutting the drugs in half would send me spiraling down fast.

What was withdrawal like?  I’m glad you asked, so I’ll tell you.  My hope is that you’ll get help right now so that you never have to feel the extent of withdrawal as i had to endure. My heart was racing and pumping out of my chest, causing my inability to rest, relax and sleep.  I could feel the irregularity of the beating with palpitations.  I had to keep telling myself to breathe because my body kept stopping my ability to breathe. My head would fall for brief moment because my body ached for sleep.  I was hungry but was unable to eat.  Food tasted like ‘death’ to me.  That’s hard to describe; however, it was as though I was eating the cadavers that had been in a morgue for days – rotting and stinking.  My tongue was a strange blue-purple color and so furry it looked like hair was growing out of it.  Both visual and audible hallucinations kept happening.  It was strange because I was able to differentiate the hallucinations from what was real, but couldn’t stop them.  They were demonic and more frightening than anything a human being could ever watch in a video or movie.  Darkness was around me – literally.  It was as though I was walking through a gray clouded storm all around me.  My skin crawled.  It was as though mice, bugs and rats were crawling on and under every part of my body, when there were none.  I knew it wasn’t real but the fear wouldn’t leave.  If it had been real, I could have done something to get ‘them’ away.  Due to it being hallucinatory, there was nothing I could do to end it.  On top of that, bugs and rodents have always been a phobia to me, so I was in hell.  I had become incontinent of urine so I was unable to control my bladder.  My bowels had stopped working from the drugs and it was very painful; just blood was coming out of me.  I was nauseous and vomiting. I was paranoid.  I remember focusing only on finding a point of contact with Jesus.  There was an internet show that my husband and I would listen to at 10 pm every evening.  I can remember listening to every word they said and singing along with the music of praise to God.  I even remember typing the words to Amazing Grace on my desktop in order to hold my focus to God and not to what was going terribly wrong in my mind and body.  I knew I was dying but didn’t know what to do.  My husband had arranged several ambulance rides to the ER , but no one cared about an ‘addict’ and they kept sending me home to die.

Through all that I went through at that time, I kept reaching out to Jesus and I knew His Hands were reaching out to me to rescue me.  The rescue happened after a few weeks of withdrawal.  It wasn’t that He couldn’t find me; I just had to go through the worst things imaginable in order to learn my lesson to be set free for the rest of my life.  You can read my story here on this blog; however, I want to tell you that, in my weak and delusional state, I was abducted and held against my will for 3 days by 3 sadists who tried to kill me.  I escaped from their torture chamber on the third day of captivity in a moment when they had to go somewhere for a few minutes.  I was locked up and locked in.  I was forced to jump 22 feet from a window that I had to crawl up stairs to get to.  It was after I jumped and crawled for a while on a lonely road to find someone who would help me, that I saw my Jesus.  He was above me reaching out His hands to me, telling me that I would have to continue to go through more very dark times, but that He would bring me to a place of total healing and that I would end up being fine and healthy, serving Him. That all came to pass, praise be to God.  For the past 11 years, I have been serving the Lord in a ministry He gave me helping those in addiction.  His message regarding the mission that I carry out for Him, was that it was Him, and Him alone, who is able to set all those in the bondage of addiction, completely FREE for life!

Would you like to enter into a recovery program from home?  It’s a program handed to me by God Himself.  It is faith based, compassionate and individualized.  It is also very affordable to just about anyone.  Please click here and see what my journey in addiction brought into being.


Posted in Addiction, Purpose, Uncategorized

A Behavioral Choice is NOT a Disease!

Yeshua woman jan 21

My addiction ended over 11 years ago and my only thoughts about it are filled with powerful ongoing gratitude to Jesus Christ for rescuing me, and for Him giving me my ministry of leading others on the holy road to the end of their recovery.  Yes… recovery ends and life begins – fresh and new.  I have no day to day struggle as the 12 Steppers brainwash people into believing.  Addiction is NOT a disease.  My day to day struggle existed only when I was in my addiction – not after it ended.  When the Lord let His Glory and mercy fall on me, my addiction – with all it’s struggles – was over and done.  On May 10, 2007, I awakened to a brand new life with addiction left buried in my past – where it belongs.  Always remember that addiction being a disease was a theory devised by two dysfunctional addicts who founded the 12 Steps.  When they were never able to end their own addictions, they theorized that it must be a disease.  The disease theory has never been proven… can’t be proven… and goes against everything that Jesus Christ stands for.  I, along with many others, am living proof that addiction is a choice made from our sinful nature.  I was once trying to escape life through drugs and alcohol; now, I’m am living it to the fullest!

Most assuredly, I say to you, whoever commits sin is a slave of sin. (John 8:34)

Full recovery is unquestionably possible.  Join our faith based compassionate personalized  recovery program that is administered one on one and online with 24/7 support.  CLICK HERE.

Posted in Addiction, Intervention, recovery, Recovery to being Recovered, Uncategorized

Families of Substance Abusers are an Integral Part in the Rescue & Recovery of their Loved One

Two things are certain:

  1. Unless they have completely hit a dangerous rock bottom that shakes them to the core of their soul, your addicted loved one will  NOT want to end their addiction on their  own; they simply can’t.
  2. You will need to intervene in very specific ways.

While it’s not a disease, when addiction takes hold, it possesses one’s soul and refuses to let go.  It’s as though your loved one has been put in a prison cell with unbendable bars and a lock to which no one has the key.  It’s bondage – plain and simple.  As I have always said,addiction is a spiritual problem that demands a spiritual solution.  The only way out is by rescue.

You are dealing with someone who is NOT the person you once knew before addiction.  This is a different person who lives to use and nothing much else matters.  You can’t deal with logic or rationality.  You need to be tough and strong.  You need to pray, and pray hard.

The addicted person lives by no moral code and no boundaries.  They function on  the level of an animal after prey.  They need to keep ‘hunting’ in order to exist and not become excrutiatingly sick from withdrawal.  They go by no rhyme or reason.   Unless you’ve been where they are, you cannot possibly understand what they’re going through.  Just know, that they are terrorized and wish this never happened to them.  They are by no means happy; however, they’ll almost always tell you that they’re fine the way they are.

So, what can you do?  Please CONTACT US and we can talk the ever so important role that you can play in setting them FREE.

Posted in Addiction, Paying it Forward, Purpose, recovered, recovery, Uncategorized

Why Pay it Forward?

But do not forget to do good and to share,
for with such sacrifices God is well pleased.
Hebrews 13:16

If you’ve never paid it forward with acts of kindness, then it’s impossible for you to know what it does to your soul and the people you help.  You need to try it!   With the deep, dark storms that we have to pass through in this life, it’s nice to know that someone else has ‘been there, done that’, and is willing to help you through.  It doesn’t take much.  Sometimes, all it takes is a kind word; other times, it takes a lot more.  You cannot measure it; it just unfolds.
pay it forward2

In my ministry, we help people recover from addiction through discipleship, Bible teaching, and coaching.  We also make paying it forward part of our program because it brings self-esteem and joy.  I remember having a client who had been recovering from a cocaine addiction.  We’ll call her ‘Jane’ to protect her identity.  She was fresh out of her addiction and we were walking and working together on her road to recovery.  She was so angry when I told her that she needed to find a way of giving back right away.  She fed me every reason on earth why not to… she lived too far from places where she could donate her time… it was too much trouble right now.. she was the one who needed help so she couldn’t help anyone else… and the excuses went on and on.  I told her that I couldn’t continue helping her unless she found just one way that she could donate her time to help someone else.  I said that this is how God works and we need to act on it – in faith.  Reluctantly, she scanned her neighborhood and found a little nearby church that, once a week,  gave food (and a variety of other necessities) away to those who were in need, so she grudgingly volunteered.  Jane excitedly called me the very next day and was talking at 100 miles per hour about how beautiful her experience had been and how much she loved helping.  She was the only volunteer who stayed until after midnight in order to talk and minister to the people she had served.  Her self worth and joy soared and her paying it forward began, along with her full recovery.

Our purpose here on earth has already been designated by our God.  He fashioned us in His image to do very specific work that only we can do.  He made it so that we would meet certain people and have unique events happen that would both change our lives for the good as well as others.  We just need to plug into that purpose by taking action.  By so doing, our joy level goes up because we are pleasing God.  Happiness comes and goes, but joy lasts forever.

Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.
Galatians 6:2

Posted in Uncategorized

Why Are You Confessing To Be Something That You Are Not?

We are more than conquerors through Him who loved us.
Romans 8:37

Our ministry attracts people who were formerly a part of the 12 Steps programs, who became discouraged because they were constantly being told that they had a disease for which there was no cure.  To top that, they were forced to admit that they were ‘addicts’ even when they hadn’t abused any substances for year.  Addiction being a ‘disease’ began with the two people who started AA and just couldn’t fix their addiction, so they devised a ‘theory’ that addiction must be a disease.  They did this to support and justify their own inability to end their addictions.

evil 12 stepsMy point today is not to go into all of the dysfunctional aspects of the 12 Steps CULT, and their lies that create their massive funding ability, but to tell you that you are NOT diseased.  Simply put, the moment you understand that you have no disease, your mind will begin to be able to heal your addictive behaviors.  Add Jesus Christ, the King of Kings and Lord of Lords, to this equation, and you can understand that we are more than conquerors“. Who, in their right mind, would choose powerlessness over our Creator’s ability to heal us completely for life?  I hope not you!

There is a cult tactic called brainwashing,  It is defined as follows:  to indoctrinate so intensively and thoroughly as to effect a radical transformation of beliefs and mental attitudes.  Brainwashing is what is done through the 12  Steps.  They brow beat you… cause you to confess that you’re an ‘addict’ (even when you’re not)… force you to believe that you are powerless… coerce you into naming anything or anyone a ‘god’ (which makes it a ‘religious’ cult)… that you are incapable of sound moral conduct… cause anonymity to put you in harm’s way from a group leader or member… instill fear as you crawl through each day… offer excuses to keep using by claiming it is a fake relapse from a fake disease and you can’t help yourself. Don’t be coerced!  Don’t be duped!  Don’t believe the lies of the heretical 12 Steps!

You have free will – a precious gift from the One True God.  You will do whatever you will yourself to do.  I realize that and I’m not trying to ‘brainwash’you;  I’m trying to bring awareness to darkness and take you out of the fears related to addiction.  I just feel better having warned you, which is my position.  All I ask is that you do your research into 12 Steps.  Google it.  If you want the truth, you’ll find it.  I’m not here to educate you about the ‘steppers’, just to warn you.  I’m warning you because freedom, given to us by Jesus Christ, is the most amazing awakening imaginable, and it lasts a lifetime.

The message to take away with you today:  Addiction, not recovery, is a one-day-at-a-time struggle;  recovery, done properly, lasts throughout your entire lifetime – without any struggle or fear – it’s over and done.

Posted in Addiction, Purpose, recovered, recovery, Uncategorized

There Is Power In The Blood

Don’t ever think for even a moment, that you are powerless over your addiction.  This is a lie straight from the pit of Hell (aka: 12 Steps).  If you are a born again believer, Jesus Christ is your strength, through His Holy Spirit, that makes you a conqueror.  If you don’t believe you have the power and authority over your addiction, then you need Salvation.

Yet in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us.

Romans 8:37


Posted in Addiction, recovered, recovery, Recovery to being Recovered, Uncategorized

How Does It Happen?

As far as addiction goes, the disease theory vs choice vs sin is still being argued and debated because the disease theorists just won’t let go – despite there being not one shred of evidence to support addiction being a disease.  Yes, there are brain changes while you’re addicted; HOWEVER, there are brain changes while you are involved in many aspects of life.  Once the addiction stops, the brain eventually returns to normal. It’s a healing process that can take up to one year or a bit more in some cases.  Whatever you believe, or put your trust in, remember that once you are addicted, ‘choosing’ to discontinue using is impossible without someone intervening to help you make a decision to detox.  As a born again believer, I am certain that drugs possess you once you let them in.

So, how does it begin…  how does it happen?  One thing is for certain – drugs (I include alcohol with drugs) do not care what race you are, if you’re male or female, whether you’re living on the streets or in a mansion, or if you’re young or old.  Drugs have no respect for you at all.  They’ll have their way with you no matter who or what you are – IF you let them in.  They do not choose you – you choose them.  The disease theory is bogus and began with the two bumbling addicts who started the 12 Steps program.  I believe that they developed that ‘theory’ in order to validate their own addictions which continued until their deaths.  There’s no better excuse to use when you say you’re told that you have a disease of which you are powerless over.  That keeps you in fear and it funds the rehabs that subscribe to this hoax of disease.  Also, for those of you who want an excuse to have those drugs available to you in your future, the disease ‘theory’ fits right in… you could say that you couldn’t help yourself because your (fake) disease kicked in!

C’mon… let’s use the rational mind that God gave us.  “For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of Power and of Love and of a Sound Mind”, (2 Timothy 1:7).  God cannot work in us unless we take Him at His Word and believe it.  The Bible clearly talks about drunkenness (drugs & alcohol) as sin – pure and simple.  Let’s own it because God says it is so.  The mind believes and does whatever it’s fed.  Feed your mind (and spirit) life and healing – not disease and hopelessness.

There are many reasons why we chose to use for the first time.  These reasons could include the choices below.  This is by no means a complete list of reasons why you chose addiction; these are simply the most common ones.

  • A doctor handed you a dangerous addictive prescription drug(s) that you made the choice to take
  • Peer pressure caused you to use because you didn’t want to show your friends(?) that you were not going to join in
  • You were depressed, anxious, hurt, broken, or in such despair, that you thought drugs or alcohol would help you run away from yourself and your problems
  • You had suicidal thoughts and you just didn’t care about yourself anymore
  • You wanted more energy and stamina
  • You thought drugs would make you smarter and increase your endurance
  • You were told you had ADD or some other FAKE disorder that was devised by shrinks who want to make the big bucks
  • You just could relax and the anxiety just got to you and you figured drugs would settle you down
  • Everyone’s doin’ it

Whatever your reasons, know that SIN is involved.  Sin is just rebellion against God’s ways and commandments.  Jesus came to set you FREE from sin, death and the grave.  You are immortal and now have the choice to get into detox, after which you can recover… possibly with us (CLICK HERE).  Please make the right choice.  Heaven or Hell awaits when you die; then, you have no further ability to choose.  Choose today.

(Do NOT attempt detox on your own.  You MUST seek professional medically supervised detox in a hospital or detox center to be safe.  There is a procedure for detox from every substance known to man.  It takes anywhere between 8 and 14 days. Don’t be foolish and try to do it yourself or you may end up dead a lot sooner than God planned. )